Archive for November 22nd, 2010

Oh Hai Colette. Films that should not be, yet are.

November 22, 2010

There are some films that are so terrible they are awesome. The Room is one such masterpiece. Between the clunky script, shocking timing, production costs that somebody clearly paid for using the coppers collected in a big vodka bottle, The Room is like a virus that gets under your skin, making you shiver in horror and hold your sides in revulsion but unable to look away. There appears to be no real script, the acting is beyond parody and the delivery of the lines is toe curlingly awful, added to this a vomit inducing sex scene that is repeated twice between an ugly naked star and the ugly ( ‘Lisa is so hawt’) psychotic co-star who gets chunkier as the film goes on and you are faced with comedy gold. That the script holds so many classic lines only adds to the horrific fabulessness of it all.

But look! Ireland can also produce such diamonds. I have recently been introduced to another film that made my gorge rise from laughing. Please observe the following trailer.

I should like to point out that yes, yes that is Mikey from Boyzone and rumour has it he or someone from team boyband attempted to have this film buried. You can watch it in its full awesomeness on YouTube. Try not to chew your fingers off while you watch the ‘action packed’ fight scenes, or the ‘druid master’ spout his wisdoms.

But shiver me timbers! What is this? Gothy, another Room worshipper sent me an email late last night containing the giddy making news that Tommy Wiseau has completed another film.

‘We have to see this!’ she said, adding a photo of Carrot Top holding a bunny to entice me further. She then sent me this photo, when I stopped going ‘bleeeeee’ I emailed her back and informed her that was overkill, and that she had me with Topper and the wabbit.

‘You’re tearing me apart Lisa!” OH…the nervous wait. Will he be naked in this one? What’s the story with his wig? Will he do the laugh? Oh please please please film fairies, please let this be as rich a seam as The Room. Anything for my princess, heh heh heh.

I cannot wait.


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